Remain the Best of Friends – Even When You’re Married!

11 Jan

One of the things I love about our marriage is the comfortable conversations we have.  Jasper (the husbo) and I don’t see each other often because of our different work schedules – he works mornings, I work in the evenings, but when we do get to see each other, we talk like there’s no tomorrow.

I am often asked how we do it.  How we can be the best of friends even when we seem to be out of sync – schedule wise.  Here are a couple of ideas why I think we remain the best of friends against all odds (are you singing now? LOL!).  These are NOT perfect answers or relationship how-to’s but I hope these inspire you somewhat.

We communicate often. It doesn’t have to be deep end conversations with us.  We talk about mundane stuff, literally anything and everything under the sun.  What we ate for the day, what we feel at the moment, or even about the games on Facebook!  When we see each other before I go to work (when he arrives from work), we greet each other hello and we say our “I love you’s”, but we say it from the heart.

We stay away from the status quo. We don’t like to limit our relationship in a box or conform to the world’s view of how we should love each other (unless it is biblical in nature).  When we go out on dates, Jasper doesn’t have to pay every time just because he’s the husband!  We take turns depending on who has extra.

We appreciate each other. Every single day, no matter how we look or smell, no matter how bratty I act, or how moody he seems. We appreciate even the smallest thing about each other and we say it. In person, through SMS, or through letters (Oh yes! We still write each other love letters!).

And I am saving the BEST for last:

We have God in the center. We go to him when we are irritated with each other.  We consecrate our plans and dreams to God – individually and together.  We pray for each other and for our marriage.  By God’s grace we follow the biblical instruction for Christian households in Ephesians 5:21-33.

Of course there are other ways, hundreds even!  But these are the major things that make us click.  And lest you go thinking we have the “perfect” marriage, let me stop you there – We don’t.  We still go through arguments, petty fights and all that stuff.  It is just by God’s grace that we are able to get past them.

Wherever you are right now in your marriage journey, I pray that you both be filled with God’s grace so you may enjoy each other, not only as husband and wife, but as best friends as well.  You are each other’s God given half.  Remember, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17

 

Best Friends!!!

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